What's Happening Here Ain't Exactly Clear
This is my first painting of my #paint52 series. It has been quite awhile since I have painted. I have been drawing quite a bit, especially with the iPad, but I found that I needed to push myself to paint more. As usual I wanted everything to be perfect. I had a drawing ready to go. I had the little people all lined up, color pallet ready. It was going to be a painting for my San Francisco series that I need to complete. Right away I ruined it. I almost felt like I did it on purpose. My subconscious, I guess didn’t want to be so linear; it wanted to explore, it wanted to play. I threw the initial painting in the trash, pulled out a used canvas and let my mind go wherever ever it wanted. I let my brush do the talking. I had to get a lot of junk out before I can start painting anything worth keeping. So I let it go, I let it ride and the words came. “What’s Happening Here Ain’t Exactly Clear”. The painting started becoming shapes and fragments that I no idea where they were going. Then I felt a need to start a portrait. It isn’t great like I so wanted my first to be, but it was necessary, the process was necessary to move forward.
As I look at the painting, I realize the portraits that I have drawn so many times in my digital “Making Faces” series wanted to be explored. Also, the red hair, hmmmm “Who is that?” 
I think Janet needs to come out and play. So I say for the journey that just started and is about to progress on for the year 2012, I say to you Janet, I give you freedom, freedom to discover who ever you want to be, however you want to paint. Let this be not only a discovery of your art, but a discovery of who you are.
Love it, Janet. Yes, playing is fun and makes everything else better. At least, that’s what I tell myself when I’m feeling guilty about working so much.
I can relate when you said that you had no idea where it was going. When I write, most times, I have no idea where I’m going to end up. I sit back and read out loud to myself and then,voila! I think I go where I need to go and so do you.
Your first paint for 2012 looks pretty good to me Janet. Keep motivated and I love the way you think.
Thanks Cheryl, it is invigorating when you let go and go on Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride
Chris, I am glad you like it. I’m looking forward to the journey. Thank you!
I think I need to take this attitude more often, it doesn’t have to be perfect the first time.
I know Sarah, hard for us to realize it never has to be perfect, in fact sometimes the mistakes can lead us to an exciting journey. Thanks for leaving a comment.
Love it Janet, specially the lines and the sun light on her hair
Thank you Irmgard. I am so excited to do this challenge and to have you like the painting is even better.
Thank you for sharing your process Janet! I love that Buffalo Springfield song and is a wonderful nutshell for what you were writing about! Sometimes you need to clear the path a bit first before you start pushing…
Hopefully, I can stay out of the way Marco and let it happen. Thank you so much for responding.